SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
