you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
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