that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
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i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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