I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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