its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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