I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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