Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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