you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
