In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I have fence marks all over my body
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
