You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
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I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
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I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
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