omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
