so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
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