I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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