well I can't set my house on fire every night
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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