I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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