Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize