I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
