I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Randomize
