THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Everything about him screamed your future.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
