Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
he just fucked me for my cheese..
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
