i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
