just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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