In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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