where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
All the doctor said was why
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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