I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Randomize
