I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
