Don't make out with my wife yet
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
