I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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