If i come over, it means nothing
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Sex in the backyard? Check.
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