This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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