Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
