maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize