You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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