okay pat passed out under dana's car
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
