You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
40s are totally the cure
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
