Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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