I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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