I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
