I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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