google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
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