She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
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Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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