4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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