Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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