that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
