**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
