Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize