My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
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