lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize
