ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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