I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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