party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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